Mates bought me a baby!
Saturday 15th November 2008
No matter how careful we were with our money, there never seemed to be enough to go round. There was only one thing for it, we'd have to prioritise.
'Maybe we should put the IVF on hold,' I sighed to my mate, Jayne Boxall, now 41. 'Money's tight enough planning the wedding.'
'No,' she gasped, leaning on the nurses' station at Good Hope Hospital in Birmingham, where we worked. 'You've wanted a family for ages.'
Jayne was right. My fiancé, Chris Gillion, 37, and I had been together seven years, and we'd been trying for a baby for four. In May 2005, we'd gone to see our GP. He'd done some tests, which found Chris's sperm count was low.
'You can try IVF,' the doctor had said. 'You're entitled to one free treatment on the NHS.'
So in February 2006, I'd started injections to stimulate my ovaries. When doctors at Queen's
Hospital in Burton-on-Trent, implanted two embryos, I tried not to raise my hopes too much.
'There's only a 30 per cent chance it'll work,' I warned Chris.
And 10 days later, disappointment hit me, when my period came.
'Maybe next time,' Chris said, cuddling me.
But that would cost us £3,500.
We had £1,500 in savings, but with my nursing job and Chris working as a yard assistant at a builders' merchant, money was tight. And I had another concern.
'I don't want to get so focused on a baby that we forget about each other,' I said to Chris, in May 2006.
Although we'd been engaged for a year, we hadn't even started planning our wedding yet.
'Neither do I,' Chris replied. 'Let's make a start with the wedding plans. If we don't go overboard, we can still save for IVF, too.'
So the next day at work, I picked up the phone and booked our wedding for 11 August at Lichfield Register Office. And we decided to turn the fortnight's holiday we'd booked to Sharm el-Sheikh, Egypt, into a honeymoon.
Now, it was July 2006, and the wedding was only three weeks away. We'd kept the costs as low as possible, but somehow, they'd crept up to £4,000. We'd booked an initial private IVF appointment for three months on, in October, but now, I was worried we couldn't afford both. Everyone at work knew we'd been trying for a baby, and now, I couldn't help pouring my heart out to Jayne.
'Don't cancel your appointment,' she insisted. 'You'll regret it if you do.'
'You're right,' I sighed. 'I guess I'll have to take on extra shifts here.'
As the big day drew closer, I tried to forget my money worries. And, three weeks later, on 11 August 2006, I slipped on my strapless ivory wedding dress and took a deep breath.
Forget the money, I told myself. Just enjoy the special day. When I arrived at the register office, Chris's eyes filled with tears.
'You're beautiful,' he whispered.
We exchanged our vows in front of 30 family members, then headed to the Nags Head Pub, in Burntwood, for a meal. And as we set off on our honeymoon the next day, it felt as if I was being carried along in a wonderful, romantic bubble.
Back home, two weeks later, I couldn't wait for our wedding party. Because we hadn't been able to afford to have all of our friends to the actual wedding, this was our chance to celebrate with them.It was at the Nags Head again, only this time, we were having a buffet, a disco and 150 guests. I wore my wedding dress again so everyone could see it, and by 9.30pm, the party was in full swing. Just as I'd taken a break from the dancefloor, the music went quiet and I heard Jayne's voice.
'Mandy, Chris, could you come up here, please?' she boomed.
What on earth?
I could see her and 50 other friends from work crammed onto the stage. As we stepped up to join them, Chris shot me a puzzled look.
'This is for you,' Jayne said, handing us a pink egg carton.
Inside were two beautiful Fabergé eggs, one purple and one blue.
'They're beautiful!' I gasped. But then, she also handed me a cheque. For £1,500!
'Oh, my God,' I spluttered.
'It's for something special,' Jayne said, giving me a discreet wink.
As I held the cheque in my hands, my arms broke out in goosebumps and I felt a lump rise in my throat.
'Thank you so much,' I gulped, as Chris stood next to me, speechless.
It turned out that Jayne had roped the whole A&E department into raising money for us by doing car washes and car boot sales, whatever they could think of to collect cash. Some even set up monthly direct debits for us. It was overwhelming. I could have the wedding and IVF. So, two weeks on, in October, I started the injections again. The specialist collected 10 eggs on 3 November, and implanted two embryos two days later.
This time, I was full of hope, and 12 days later, I did a pregnancy test. It couldn't be, I thought, staring at it. As soon as Chris got home, I was waving it under his nose.
'Is that a faint line?' he grinned.
'I hope so,' I said, nervously.
The next morning, I did another test. This one was definitely positive. I sent texts to everyone at work. It worked! At my 12-week scan, we learned we were only expecting one baby, but we were still thrilled. Everyone at work was so protective of me, and made sure I took it easy. Then at 34 weeks, I realised the baby hadn't moved in a while and panic hit. I phoned Burton Hospital. The doctors decided to deliver the baby straight away.
'We don't have any spare beds,' they said. 'We'll transfer you to Good Hope Hospital.'
There was nowhere I'd feel safer. And an hour later, at 7.48pm, I had a Caesarean.
'It's a boy,' the midwife smiled, as Chris held my hand.
But 3lb Alfie was in distress. He'd been bleeding in the womb and was anaemic. At 11pm,
I was taken to see him. He was tiny, but perfect.
'We all want you to get well,' I sniffed, stroking his hand.
And he did. A month on, our fighter was home. He's a very happy 17 months now, and loves Thomas the Tank Engine. I can't imagine life without him, and it's all thanks to my friends.
Alfie's the best wedding gift ever.
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