Abused by family friend!
The so called family friend
Thursday 10th July 2008
Snorting with laughter, I reached for another prawn cracker. Nothing like a girly get-together, is there? Me and my best mate, Steph Longden, 19, met up at mine most Tuesday nights. She'd bring her mum, Linda, and along with my mum, Chris, 50, we'd put the world to rights over takeaway and a few glasses of wine.
Steph and I had been best mates all through secondary school. She was like a sister to me, and Linda and her husband, Mark, 42, were like a second set of parents. I'd even been on holiday with them to Gran Canaria. We'd had such a laugh, with Mark, a prison officer, pushing us into the pool and larking about in the apartment with a colander on his head.
Now, in December 2006, it was our last girls' night of the year. At around 10.30pm, Mark came to collect Steph and Linda.
'Happy New Year!' I called out to him in the car.
I knew everyone would be back to work as normal after the New Year, and I didn't know when I'd see them again. So, just over a week later, on 9 January, when I was getting into the shower one morning and heard the front door open, I assumed Mum had nipped back from her job as a teaching assistant to collect something.
But when I did up my pink pyjamas, and popped my head round the door to check, I saw Mark climbing our stairs.
'What are you doing?' I asked, a bit freaked out he'd let himself in.
'I need to talk to you,' he said. 'Which one's your bedroom?'
Steph's grandad had cancer. Was it something to do with that? Feeling uncomfortable, I led him to my room, where he told me to sit. He stood in the doorway.
'I've seen you smoking,' he said. 'Do your mum and dad know?'
I was 17, so it wasn't as though it was illegal, but I knew Mum wouldn't be thrilled…
'Yeah, they know,' I bluffed.
But Mark saw through me.
'It's OK,' he said. 'I'll keep your little secret, if you'll keep mine…'
What secret?
I nodded uncertainly as he grinned at me, before asking
if he could use the loo.
'All right,' I replied, glancing at the clock.
I was going to miss the bus at this rate. What was all this about?
Two minutes later, Mark stepped back into my room. Totally naked.
Horrified, I didn't know where to look, as he walked towards the bed and sat down beside me. My heart was pounding hard in my chest. Oh God. Was he going to rape me?
'I want to know if you'll pleasure me,' Mark said.
I felt sick, terrified. I wanted to run, but I didn't want to anger him.
'Y-you're like a dad to me,' I stammered. 'I couldn't do that.'
'I didn't think you would,' Mark replied. 'Maybe when you're 18?'
'Erm, maybe,' I lied.
Mark changed tack then.
'I'm sorry,' he said. 'I shouldn't have done that. I've been feeling horny, and I fancied you.'
But while he was saying sorry, his left hand was creeping up the inside of my right thigh, and he was stroking my back with his other hand.
Stay calm, I told myself. It'll be over soon. But it seemed ages before he got up and dressed in front of me. As he pulled on his underpants, tracksuit bottoms and red top, he said: 'Don't tell anyone. It could
ruin friendships and relationships.'
Then he left. I burst into tears. What the hell had just happened? Should I tell anyone?
In a daze, I realised I was going to be late for work, so I pulled on my uniform and ran outside, only just making the bus. I was still shaking when I got to Tesco, where I worked in the café.
'You all right, love?' my colleague, Joyce, asked.
I burst into tears.
'I can't say what's wrong,' I sobbed.
Joyce fetched my Aunty Josie, 58, who also worked in the store. When she arrived, I broke down, telling her everything.
'He did what?' she gasped.
She called in my brother, Richard, who was working at Tesco during his university holidays, then rang my dad, Steve, 53. Mum and Dad both came to pick me up.
'Do you want to go to the police?' Dad asked.
'No,' I wailed. 'Steph'll freak out.'
I also knew it would ruin Mum's friendship with Linda. But I kept thinking how Mark had let himself into my house. What if he came back?
So, Mum and Dad took me to Mansfield Police Station and arranged for me to give a statement the following day. I couldn't face sleeping in my bedroom, so Dad went in there while I slept with Mum. And next day, I didn't dare answer the phone in case it was Linda or Steph. Later, I gave my statement.
'We'll arrest him tonight,' the officer said.
I felt numb. It was all so horrible.
In the past, I'd have turned to Steph. But this time, she was the one person I couldn't call. I slept in Mum's bed for the next couple of months, but I still had nightmares, in which I'd find Mark naked in my room. Mum washed my pyjamas and the bedlinen, but I refused to use them again. I kept going over it in my head. When did Mark start thinking about me in that way? It put all our happy times in
a different light.
I didn't feel safe on my own, so when I wasn't at work, I went everywhere with Mum and Dad. I didn't hear from Steph or her mum, but friends said Steph hated me. I saw Linda in the street once, but she just put her head in the air and walked by. Mark claimed I'd 'misunderstood' him. How can you misunderstand a naked man — your best mate's dad — on your bed?
On 1 March 2007, Mark pleaded guilty to sexual assault on a female at Mansfield Magistrates Court. On 4 April, he was given 10 months in prison. He'll also have to sign the sex offenders' register for 10 years.
There were rumours he was only pleading guilty 'to get it over with', but if he really was innocent, surely he'd have denied it? In court, his lawyer blamed the stress of his dad's illness, but Judge Michael Stokes told Mark: 'No wonder she thought she was going to be raped. The offence is so serious, only a custodial sentence can be justified.'
Mark was released last September, after five months inside.
I heard the Longdens had a party to celebrate. His lies might keep them on his side. I know the truth. Mum and I lost two really good friends through Mark's actions, and I hate him for that. Mum blames herself for leaving the door unlocked that day, and I've asked myself if I was to blame. Was it something I'd said? Something I'd done? When I see Mark round town, I feel like hiding. But, as Mum reminds me: 'Hold your head up high. You're not the guilty one.'